I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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