I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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