just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
