That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Randomize