i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
My boob is missing a layer of skin
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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