kristin has been a bad kristin
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
