Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
