He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
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