is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
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