My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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