he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
