love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
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