Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
