I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
He shit in the fireplace
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
