If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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