Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Randomize
