How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
