I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize