yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
