i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
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