Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize
