office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Randomize
