It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize
