she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Randomize