party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
never play flip cup with pint glasses
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize