I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
