No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
