Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
3pm strippers are depressing
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
did i just pee glitter
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
