He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
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