I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
