I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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