That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
