That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
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