smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
