Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
it was like eating out sand paper
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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