i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize