I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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