I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Randomize
