Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
