id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
