sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Soap is not a condiment
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
