Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Randomize
