a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
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