HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
