i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
