love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
