I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
