Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
