Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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