apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
operation have a gay friend backfired
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
